Vijay and Shefali's TAtW

Ohhhh snnnnapppppppp. Sri Lanka is awesome!! It actually reminded us both a lot of India, probably because of all the heat and South Indians. Also, the air quality is about standard for South Asia, and by that I mean you can expect to constantly feel dirty and eventually see black boogers and grayish-brown earwax. Also, it smells like Naples. True story. Colombo was our first destination and also the first place we really got to start adventuring after the setbacks we experienced in Dubai (which we still managed to enjoy). It’s the main city and is much less rural than the other places we visited. And it is a far, far cry from anything in the west to the uninitiated. Shefali and I were wondering about that too, if we weren’t Indian, if we hadn’t traveled, how would we really experience this place? Cause right now we’re like “damn, that stinks. Samosas?” You just accept it and move on. I need to learn to apply that technique to the rest of my life. Here’s a list of observations to help you if you’re ever here. To be honest, the majority apply to most of Southeast Asia, and I suppose that’s part of the charm. There is so much more to come, we can’t wait to share it with you.

• Eat without fear. Mystery meat, wild colors, stuff that smells the same going in as coming out served from a dodgy metal cart or inside a small convenience store. As long as nothing’s moving, it’s all good. This is my default behavior. You will definitely get some kind of food poisoning if you employ this approach.
• That being said, don’t consume the water even slightly. Not even for brushing your teeth.
• Mentally prepare yourself for tourist prices. Especially as a westerner and especially as a vanilla-face. Those fuckers will try and rip you off at every turn.
• Haggle for everything and bargain hard. Lowball them and then be insulted that they’re insulted. Given half the chance they would do the same to you. Those fuckers will try and rip you off at every turn.
• Do the math. Everywhere you go, count every penny and make them show you how they arrived at that number. Grade their work and don’t give partial credit. Never let your guard down. Those fuckers will try and rip you off at every turn.
• For getting around a city, take the tuk tuks. It’s like a three-wheel motorcycle with a hood around the whole jawn. It’s super cheap and part of the experience. It’s actually a lot of fun. Agree on prices before hand and keep an eye on the meter. You know why. In case you don’t it’s because those fuckers will try and rip you off at every turn.
• Hire a driver. It’s probably the best thing you can do to see the most on the island. It’s expensive for Asian prices but actually very cheap considering how much ground you cover and what your driver can introduce you to. This more than anything made Sri Lanka the most memorable part of the trip for me. Props to Shefali for the idea.
• The driver will recommend hotels and restaurants for you. They get a commission from pretty much every place they bring you to. Check everything out before committing to anything. Check the bathrooms too.
• Squat toilets and bum guns. They are exactly what they sound like. Understand their use and application.
• Drink the tea. As much as you can. It is the best in the world.
• All natives you meet are fuckers and will try to rip you off at every turn

Shefali and Vijay